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Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex (平装)
by John Gray, Ph.D.
| Category:
Relationship |
| Market price: ¥ 158.00
MSL price:
¥ 148.00
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| Stock:
In Stock |
MSL rating:
 Good for Gifts |
| MSL Pointer Review:
Fun and practical, this famous book provides an enormously interesting read to help you better understand differences between sexes. |
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AllReviews |
1 2   | Total 2 pages 11 items |
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A reader (MSL quote), USA
<2006-12-30 00:00>
This is a book that I feel everyone in a significant relationship should read. By understanding some of the key differences between men and women, better relationships can be built with more realistic expectations and more forgiveness. When men understand why women act the way they do and why they expect certain things from men, they can more readily accept them for who they are and give reason to sometimes unreasonable seeming requests (and the same is true for women).
While most of the points in this book are fairly evident, there are a lot of insights that most people don't really think about that have big impacts on relationships. I find it somewhat refreshing to read a sometimes brutally honest book about the biological differences between men and women in this age when all the emphasis goes to strong independent women who are equal in every way to men. In fact, there are major differences in our very cores that influence the way we view others, feel emotionally, think about the world, and even our wants and needs.
I strongly recommend this book to anybody, male or female, who wants to understand what is going on in your partners head and wants to build a more trusting and understanding relationship.
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Kristie Davis (MSL quote), USA
<2006-12-30 00:00>
It's basically a worse case scenario handbook. If you're needs aren't being met, you don't feel understood, you feel smothered or things are just intense and unhappy. It points out all the major buttons that could be setting you or your partner off and how to quit pushing them.
There are so many points that have hit home for me. It's a great relief to know his and her behavior is 'normal' and there's an explanation for it. Why men have caves, and women have wells. How our motivations in relationships are different and how to use it to our advantage. It has some great kiss and makeup techniques along with a dialogue translator.
I must say I have a love/hate relationship with this book. I've seen great benefits in my understanding of the opposite sex and relationships with them from it. Most relationships go through rocky times and this book could keep drama down to a minimum. Although, in my heart, life has to get better than what this book describes. John Gray also has books for more specific aspects of relationships, read this one first for a better understanding. I'd recommend this book for singles looking to improve their relationship skills and couples that fight, have drawn battle lines, or desire meet each others needs more harmoniously.
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Roua Albater (MSL quote), USA
<2006-12-30 00:00>
I like what I read in this book, its a valuable book that you must own to improve your relationship, it shows us how totally men and women are different in their thinking. and also how to get what you want in your relationship. and you can understand your partner easier now, It opens your eyes to a new way of seeing and perceiving men and women, its a worth buy book, you won’t regret if you buy it, I read it many times, and I am gonna read it again. |
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Laura (MSL quote), USA
<2006-12-30 00:00>
This book has always been on my "must read" list but it wasn't until a little while ago that I actually picked it up and read it from cover to cover. From what I have experienced in my past relationships this book was dead on. Men are like rubberbands stretching and needing space, which if you give it to them they will spring back to you and women are like waves that go in a series of highs and lows. However, I felt that at times the author was repeating himself over and over to make the book thicker. What could have been said in a page he would say in a chapter. However, this is a must read for anyone interested in why the opposite sex behaves the way they do. It truly makes you understand them more and it helps you put yourself in their position. |
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Jean Pouliot (MSL quote), USA
<2006-12-30 00:00>
When this book came out, I convinced myself that Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus was just another empty-headed, catchily-titled, self-help franchise. "Mars/Venus" certainly has become a franchise, but here I am wishing I had read it years ago!
In Mars/Venus, John Gray shares fascinating insights into the disparate emotional lives of men and women. In some ways, the books seems to confirm ancient stereotypes about the sexes, which makes me a bit wary. Men occasionally need to retreat to their "caves." Women's moods oscillate for no particular reason, putting them in a "well." Whatever the truth to these assertions, Gray's main message is that when a man understands how utterly different the female emotional experience is from his own, he might stop expecting her to react as he would, giving her the kind of love and support she "really" needs. And vice versa.
The strength of the book lies in the strong visual images it uses to hammer home its points: the Rubber Band, the Cave, the Tornado, the Well. The section detailing the way men and women score love "points" was hilarious and eye-opening. Save the diamond necklaces fellas. You'll get as much appreciation if you take her to the movies! The book's self-help techniques were also impressive. The Love Letter, described in Chapter 11, gives women and men a safe way to express anger, sadness, fear, regret and love, and to imagine how their partner would ideally respond. The partner can be spouse, parent (past or present), self (past or present) or even the deity.
The book's weakness is its length, repetitiveness and perhaps its lack of originality. This was especially evident in the audio version, in which charts (which might have been scanned visually in the book) had to be read in their entirety. Entire sections in the middle chapters seem to echo material from earlier in the book. Perhaps this was done deliberately to help readers grasp points by dint of sheer repetition. But there were sections in the 8-CD unabridged version that I skipped without loss of information. I'm also concerned somewhat about contentions that Gray borrowed his materials from others. But whether all ideas originate with him, I congratulate him for packaging them in a way that is understandable and helpful.
Mars/Venus will expose men's dirty little secret that we are fragile and emotional creatures. Men are fearful of many things, in Gray's on-target opinion, not least of which is rejection or lack of admiration by the woman they love. Gray also shows the logic behind the male-confounding "emotional" responses of women. Gray not only exposes the differing perspectives that men and women bring to relationships, but advises them on how to navigate the stormy seas of love. By changing the way they respond to each other, Gray hopes that men and women can get the emotional support they both crave. |
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A reader (MSL quote), USA
<2006-12-30 00:00>
This will not be a professional critique, simply my opinion. I am almost done with the book and I love it and have learned SO much. As a woman, I was surprised to learn some things about men that seem so plain when spelled out in the way they were. Now I feel like "I get it" in a general way. As I read, I thought "OH! so THAT'S why he did that..." It has improved my confidence and "validated" my behavior in my own relationship. Yes, I have been doing the right thing, as unsure as I was at the time. As for the non-supporters of this book, if you are not willing to give in a relationship then this book, and possibly a healthy relationship just isn't for you! We need to cooperate and accept each other and if you are dead set on things being on your terms all the time, you will certainly not benefit from this book.
This book should be required reading for all, in my opinion. It's not the answer, but boy does it help unlock some mysteries and help us to realize the differences. Stereotypical as they may be at times, there is a reason for it. We came from a time when what we now refer to as sterotypes was the norm and we are still the same people just trying to grow and successfully cross those lines. We can't fight our own biology and chemicals, so embrace it and do your best to understand the basic nature of it. We ARE different, and much more than I had realized before opening this book. Give the love that you feel you deserve. Compromise and understanding are two words that can help sum this book up. Unfortunately I do not think very many single men will be reading this book on their own and I am certainly not about to suggest it to my boyfriend (because of many reasons explained in the book!) but maybe I can put my newfound knowledge of men to work and convey some of what I have learned to him in a way that will help him to understand me as I have learned to understand him better. If you are a single man who has taken it upon himself to read this book, then GOOD JOB from this Venusian! Thanks for reading my opinion! |
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Carrillo (MSL quote), USA
<2006-12-30 00:00>
Some time ago my wife and I were had a big fight. It left each one of us feeling as the offended party, and waiting for the other to apologize: I thought she kept complaining about everything I did, she felt I did not care about her. Really angry, I bought the book, and after reading a few pages I was able to understand her point of view. As soon as I tried to explain how she felt (not why), we got out of the cycle.
The book has very helpful insights. The author mentions that differences get stronger when people are in a close relationship, and almost disappear when people have been single for a while. I agree: I'd recommend the book to newlyweds after they start disagreeing about trivial stuff, but not during their honeymoon.
Why, then, four stars only? Because the first few chapters are much more useful than the last ones; I don't agree completely with the book; the Mars-Venus analogy gets tiresome: I'd rather read: "Men do this, Women do that" instead of "Martians do this, Venusians do that"; and finally, the author incessantly promotes his other books and products throughout the book.
In spite of those issues that made it a little less enjoyable, the book has really helped me improve my marriage, and I highly recommend it.
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Eric Evans (MSL quote), USA
<2006-12-30 00:00>
I was absolutely appalled at the blatant sexism of this book. It is nothing but a collection of tired old gender stereotypes. The only thing good that can be said about this book is that Gray is impartial; he insults both men and women equally. He focuses on the most superficial aspects of human behavior as if they were profound, innate, and of the greatest importance. According to "Doctor" Gray, the secret to having a successful relationship is to resign yourself to the fact that your partner is petty and shallow and always will be. This book gives people dangerously bad advice. There are plenty of good books available on relationship psychology by knowledgeable authors. Read them and avoid this book. It is worthless. |
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Diana (MSL quote), USA
<2006-12-30 00:00>
This is a great book. I bought it both for my in-laws and my parents and I honestly recommend it to any couple that seems to have problems with understanding each other. My husband loves it too. He read it after I did and would come and ask me: "Did you read chapter 7? It is so good... I wish I knew all this before I met you". We are a newly married couple and this book seemed to help a lot with "the translation" of the meaning that comes with our words and gestures. It is indeed eye opening and very helpful in describing small steps and small changes that you can do in your everyday life to bring more peace in your family and rediscover the strength of the love you have for your partner! It is the beginning of a transformation process that only you can continue so if your looking for an answer this book might have it for you but you have to use it the right way and maybe reread it every so often. It made a big difference for us. |
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Ashley Romano (MSL quote), USA
<2006-12-30 00:00>
Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, is a book on real life relationships. It talks about the different languages men and women speak, and how to deal with them, how to score points with the opposite sex, how to ask and receive support, how to avoid arguments and basically all you need to know in order to have a happy and successful relationship. Author John Gray does an amazing job in representing both men and women's point of view on everything. Typically you would think that since Gray is a male he would talk more about men and how they are superior, but he does not. You can see that he did a lot of research and probably interviewed many people, especially women, before sitting down to write this book.
After reading the first chapter of this book in my expository writing class, I immediately wanted to read the rest of it. I went out a few days later and brought the book, it had me hooked the whole time I read it. I am amazed at how well the author represents each and every aspect of a relationship, both by the men and women. I also think it's great how all the stuff he says is so accurate. I was reading in the book and every other minute I was thinking to myself "Oh my gosh, so true" or just laughing to myself.
Throughout the book John Gray wrote some lists, mainly of common queries, or misunderstandings between couples. Those were my favorite parts of the book, because I was like, "Whoa this guy really knows what he's talking about." Another main thing that had me hooked into the book was how he presented everything. When he wanted to talk about how men always try and help but usually make things worse, he called it "Mr. Fix-It and the Home Improvement Committee." The author also added in some example problems, in which he interviewed different couples. He would present you the problem, what both people had to say and then offered a solution. I think that was very effective because sometimes, just like in math class, it's all a bunch of mumble jumble, until you got an example, then you totally understand it.
This book is a necessity for everyone, both men and women. At some point everyone is in a relationship, successful or unsuccessful. This book can help you understand you partner better, especially if you are in a relationship right now. If you are not you can better understand why your last relationship failed if you are unclear, or learn how to make the best of your next relationship. I believe that anyone who reads this book will get a lot of humor out of it, because the author hits everything right on the nose, so its completely accurate and will have you laughing. You will also learn a lot from this book I think, so I give it a thumbs up and recommend it to everyone, whether you are fifteen and beginning to experience relationships or eighty five and have experienced them for a long time.
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1 2 | Total 2 pages 11 items |
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