|
Self Matters: Creating Your Life from the Inside Out (平装)
by Dr. Phil McGraw
| Category:
Self-help |
| Market price: ¥ 158.00
MSL price:
¥ 148.00
[ Shop incentives ]
|
| Stock:
Pre-order item, lead time 3-7 weeks upon payment [ COD term does not apply to pre-order items ] |
MSL rating:
 Good for Gifts |
| MSL Pointer Review:
The author’s winning formula: knowing yourself and overcoming life’s struggles with a little effort and retraining your mind to right thinking. |
| If you want us to help you with the right titles you're looking for, or to make reading recommendations based on your needs, please contact our consultants. |
|
| |
AllReviews |
1 Total 1 pages 10 items |
|
|
Roberts (MSL quote), USA
<2007-01-09 00:00>
Whatever the given human experience may be, I am convinced that what we invest in it will determine the nature and extent of the value we derive from it. That's certainly true of our relationships with others and especially true of the relationship we have with ourselves. Phillip McGraw is only the most recent of countless media celebrities such as Bishop Fulton Sheen, Esther Lederer ("Ann Landers"), Pauline Van Buren ("Abigail Van Buren"), Joyce Brothers, Ruth Westheimer, and Laura Schlessinger. My hunch (only a hunch) is that their staunchest admirers are those who have made the greatest effort to apply in their own lives what these popular psychologists have advocated. Second hunch (only a hunch): Many of those most critical of them are (at worst) envious of their fame whereas others are concerned that complicated problems will be trivialized by what they view as simplistic solutions.
McGraw may be the most controversial of them all because he seems to be (intentionally) the most confrontational of them all. This is the latest of several books he has written. In it, he insists that self-esteem really matters and explains why. That got me to thinking again about The Golden Rule. More specifically, about all of the recent inhumanities (other than acts of terrorism) which the media have publicized so extensively. It seems logical to me to assume that if people are consumed by self-loathing, they will be following The Golden Rule when they "do unto others" as they would have others "do unto them." Is not most dysfunctional behavior directly or indirectly related to self-esteem problems? Of course self matters! It matters a great deal. In many situations, it could quite literally determine matters of life or death.
In this volume, McGraw answers two questions of special importance to me. First, what must I do to increase my self-esteem and then sustain at the highest possible level? Also, how can I be most helpful to others who do not a high level of self-esteem? It would be a disservice to both McGraw and those who read this review to indicate what I think his answers are but I will say that the first answer places full responsibility on me...and on no one else. Period. No news there, you say? Not so fast. The book's subtitle is "Creating Your Life from the Inside Out." Easy to say. (I think he means Re-Creating" rather than "Creating.") Think about it. What will it take to get "inside"? He seems to ask: How much time and effort, concentration and determination, patience amidst frustration and discomfort are you willing to commit? More to the point, how serious ARE you?
Obviously, McGraw cannot make that journey for us. (No one can.) But he can certainly help to prepare us for what awaits. Hence the importance of three questions he asks his reader to answer. Thus far,
1. What have been the ten (10) most defining moments of your life?
2. What were the seven (7) most critical choices you have made to place you on your current path?
3. Who have been the five (5) most pivotal people in your life and how have they shaped you?
Try answering these three questions (with total honesty, of course) before you read the book. Then review your answers after you read the book. To reiterate, whether or not you buy and then read the book, the value you derive from this exercise will wholly depend on how much you invest in it. And that, McGraw insists, is also true of your life. |
|
|
An American reader (MSL quote), USA
<2007-01-09 00:00>
I admire Dr. Phil and enjoyed this book, particularly the exercises. I certainly gained insight and understanding into why I do the things I do. Dr. Phil tells us about his own life and how he made mistakes so that you know he is as human as the rest of us. I read another book recently which I recommend you read with Self Matters called Optimal Thinking: How To Be Your Best Self. Optimal Thinking is a practical no-nonsense book which showed me how to be my best, bring out the best in other people and make the most of whatever comes my way (whether they be a rainy day, distressing feelings, malicious people or financial challenges etc.) Make sure you get a copy of each of these books. |
|
|
Honing (MSL quote), USA
<2007-01-09 00:00>
Negative reviews of this book almost made me not get it. I didn't want a book to "be mean to me" at a time in my life when I was feeling very delicate. I wasn't depressed, per se, but an overall malaise had overwhelmed me and that fact was pretty depressing. I just felt like my life was meaningless and not worth living; a drudgery.
So, despite all these negative reviews, I ordered this book and gave it a shot. As soon as I began reading it, I felt more relaxed, I found myself smiling - Dr. Phil shares his own stories with you as if to say: "It happens to everyone. You are not alone. Now that you know what it is, you can DO something about it."
Perhaps some people want a self-help book to solve their problems for them, and maybe this book requires too much effort on their parts. But - and perhaps this comes from being a proud southerner like Dr. Phil - when something is wrong, even with me, I want to fix it myself. This book doesn't "diagnose and treat" your problems, it helps you figure out what they are, when they happened, and inspires you to turn things around.
Again, perhaps I was too eager to find my "Authentic Self" when I picked up this book, but I didn't find it abrasive or insensitive at all. On the contrary, I felt like Dr. Phil was speaking only to me, and because my problems had once been his problems, he handled them with utmost understanding and care.
If you feel lost- like you aren't living a life you want, like you've gone too far down a path you no longer enjoy, like you aren't "you" anymore - I encourage you to read this book. It will help you find the "real you", and with that, peace of mind.
|
|
|
Leung (MSL quote), Canada
<2007-01-09 00:00>
I really did not want to like this book. It was probably the tone of reading a couple of pages that set me off. It seemed as though the author was being too pushy, trying to convince the average individual that they had problems when they really didn't.
But I did have problems and that's why I continued to read. I have read practically all the famous self-help books out there and still hadn't experienced any significant changes in my life. This book in my opinion is like Psychocybernetics, where you are to go into your own past and dig deep to find out why you think the way you do and most importantly why its stopping you from achieving success. It is similar as I said but this book actually contains helpful exercises that Psychocybernetics does not. The homework is long but its well worth the insight you gain.
In short this books is probably the best packaged self-help book to date. The only flaw I find in it is that it is vague on how to tell about using your imagination/ visualization as a tool to help you excel in future endeavors, that is what Pyschocybernetics had that this book does not. It also lacks some good goals setting strategies but that's what Life Strategies is all about.
It certainly isn't the be all and end all of all self-help books and the material isn't exactly new. But IT IS the best packaged self-help book out there to date.
|
|
|
An American reader (MSL quote), USA
<2007-01-09 00:00>
According to Frank Perdue it takes a Tough man to make a tender chicken. According to Dr. Phil's book Self Matters by Phillip C. McGraw Ph.D., it takes some tough talk and some mighty hard self-examination to snap people out of their "fictional selves" and into their "authentic selves". Question everything you think you know about you, every belief, every thought you tell yourself, every limiting behavior you exhibit. Track down the origin, learn how it effects you and if it isn't part of your authentic self, toss it. Junk it. It's a gigantic psychological spring-cleaning. All this is hard work according to Dr. Phil. Hard, hard work, but worth it in the end. I enjoyed the Dr's tough talk, it is entertaining, motivating and energizing, I like the idea of questioning my beliefs about who I am taking a good look at what is really true for me.
As I read this book, I kept flashing in my mind to a book that I have read on a number of occasions that has had a profound and lasting impact in my life, entitled Working on Yourself Doesn't Work by Ariel and Shya Kane. While both books invite you to question your limiting beliefs and look at yourself honestly and courageously, the Kanes encourage you not to judge what you see or to try and fix or change it. Instantaneous Transformation, how the Kanes refer to their work, rests on the principle that awareness, the nonjudgmental seeing of what is, is all that is needed to unwind the habitual, unquestioned behaviors of a lifetime. No struggle, no hard work, just some courage and honesty and the willingness to step into one's greatness.
|
|
|
Susan Smith (MSL quote), USA
<2007-01-09 00:00>
This book was an interesting read; I enjoyed hearing all of Dr. Phil's amusing personal stories. I guess this book could be helpful if one actually had the motivation to get through all of the exercises. However, discomforting is the fact that most of the concepts in this book, actually every concept in this book, is largely stolen from other prominent psychologists such as Maslow and Erikson. There is no credit cited for any source used in this book. |
|
|
Christine Jones (MSL quote), Australia
<2007-01-09 00:00>
Though a fan of Dr Phil's show, I hadn't read any of his books. A friend said Self Matters was a must read and so I went out and got a copy. Though thinking I had me all sussed out, this book was not only a refresher course but also gave me a lot more to personally work on. Self matters is what the book is about, being true to yourself, the authentic you. Dr Phil talks straight, in a language that even someone like me can understand and that's saying something with 30 years of illiteracy under my belt.
Scared to look inside and let the real you come forth? Well get hold of this book and you will learn how to move on in life instead of fearing the world and being bound by it. Dr Phil takes you step by step; he doesn't leave you wondering what to do after reeling off pages of his personal pains and triumphs like a lot of other self-help books do. I also did not feel I was being paid off by just cheering me on, Dr Phil makes it clear it is our choice, we can just be all lip service or get down and act upon what we learn. I am so impressed by the book; I have encouraged all members of my family to read it.
|
|
|
Chap Gmunderson (MSL quote), USA
<2007-01-09 00:00>
As a longtime Dr. Phil and Oprah fan, I got this book with the highest of expectancy. However, I find it to be full of advice which if followed, would not be as effective as that in his previous tomes. Obviously we create our lifes from the inside out. How else would this happen? Outside-in is just backwards and leaves a hollow person like one of those chocolate rabbits that aren't as good as the solid ones and ruin Easter. This is the type of obvious logic which runs rampart in this book of Dr. Phil. The lack of input of Oprah is also sorely lacking, and may be the reason for my disappoint- ment. Normally I find his "get real" Phil-osophy (get it?) to be a breath of fresh air, but here it is "over the edge" - when he cites an example of a man being unsure of how to paint his car and despondent over his losing of a job and his girlfriend turning out to be underage, Dr. Phil is uncharacteristically harsh, and his advise consists of "get over it". Get over it? Dr. Phil, I may be "over you", which makes me sad because some of the best times of my life has been reading your advice, watching your shows, watching you on Oprah and the fireworks between you that are close to heaven's ardor, reading your cookbooks, eating your snack bars, and watching you on other talk shows talking about how you look like Jeffrey "Hey Now!" Tambor and revealing your good humor about that embarassment, and how you even occasionally say "Hey Now!" to people to raise their spirits. These things I hold dear, and I hope in the future you stick to what you know best, good "get real" advice, and stay away from life-creating; that is God's work, I hope you know. |
|
|
An American reader (MSL quote), USA
<2007-01-09 00:00>
This is one of the books that changed my life. Like everyone, I first heard about Dr. Phil on TV and found that he had some interesting things to say. So I decided to buy this book because I thought I might learn some valuable things. By reading this book I learned so much about myself that I am now a completely different person. I am more aware of my inner desires and feelings and I am more aware of my instinctive responses. It is a new life! Once I got to this level, I was ready for a little more and so I read another great book called The Ever-Transcending Spirit by Toru Sato. That book took me to a totally new level! It gave me the answers to almost all of the questions I had about what was going on in my life. I hope that everyone can learn these valuable things to change their lives in a positive way! |
|
|
An American reader (MSL quote), USA
<2007-01-09 00:00>
Dr. Phil's books fall into the category of "cheerleading" books. This book is no exception. What do I mean by "cheerleading"? Well, he makes us feel good - for a while. He gives us advice (some sound). Problem is, he doesn't actually offer people a cure for mental/emotional problems. Rather, his advice is more like "move on with your life and get over it". Problem is, you can't change the affects of past traumas and abuse, unless you can discharge some emotional aspect of the original trauma/abuse - such that it no longer affects you in the present. You can make better decisions, but the affects of the trauma will be part of you for a lifetime, unless…
In thirty years of practice, I have not seen one person cured unless they successfully “discharged” some emotional aspect of the original trauma.
If you are truly looking for a “cure” to resolve all past traumas, you will find that answer in Redirecting Self Therapy (RST), as discovered by retired neuroscientist Elnora Van Winkle. This therapy is actually “curing” thousands and bringing people to full recovery. This is a new break- through therapy and it not widely known. It has “cured” everyone in my practice who uses it correctly, inluding me (the therapist). It is the only method I use now. I can't provide a link here, but you can do your own "search" later. It is absolutely free - and no one is making money off of this discovery. If the world could understood this discovery, we could free the world from dependency from psychiatrists, and psychiatric drugs. While Dr. Phil may have a good heart, he does not have knowledge to cure people.
|
|
|
|
1 Total 1 pages 10 items |
|
|
|
|
|
|
