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Emotional Blackmail: When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation, and Guilt to Manipulate You (平装)
by Susan Forward, Ph.D.
| Category:
Relationship, Self defense |
| Market price: ¥ 158.00
MSL price:
¥ 148.00
[ Shop incentives ]
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| Stock:
In Stock |
MSL rating:
 Good for Gifts |
| MSL Pointer Review:
The author clearly defines the various types of emotional blackmailers, the tactics they use, and the reasons they are effective, and gives specific steps to ending the cycle of manipulation. |
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AllReviews |
1 Total 1 pages 10 items |
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Susan Jeffers (Ph.D., author of Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway), USA
<2006-12-30 00:00>
Breathe a sigh of relief! Susan Forward helps you identify and correct an intensely destructive and confusing pattern of relating with those you love. I highly recommend this important book! |
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A reader (MSL quote), USA
<2006-12-30 00:00>
Forward, who gave us the best-selling The Men Who Hate Women, and the Women Who Love Them, offers a course on self-defense for anyone manipulated by guilt. |
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A reader (MSL quote), USA
<2007-07-04 00:00>
I am an emotional blackmailer, I just had no idea until I read this book. It was suggested to me by my soon to be ex- husband who couldn't take it anymore. I thought I was being strong and standing my ground and this book helped me to see that I was emotionally bullying other people. I beleived I was always right and no human being can be. It also helped me to see that it doesn't matter if you are wrong or right, making another person feel as if they must agree with you or they are "bad" is not OK. I was using the behaviors descibed in the book to protect myself from being hurt and have hurt sooooo many others in the process. If you're a person who always feels like a victim or have no idea why so many people don't like you when you think you're such a wonderful person read it! |
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A reader (MSL quote), USA
<2007-07-04 00:00>
If you think you might be a victim of a parent or loved one who is using emotional blackmail to manipulate you and keep you from growing or changing, then this book is for you.
I had such a loved one in my life, who was manipulating me with her own pain, keeping me from growing up, keeping me from being a man and doing what I needed to do.
I won't go into the details, but you know if you are a victim of manipulation by this "emotional blackmail". Does someone threaten to write you out of their lives if you do such and such? Does someone break down and cry or get sick every time you bring up a certain subject? Does someone make you "walk on eggshells" around them, around certain subjects?
If any of the above ring true, then you are a victim of emotional blackmail and should read this book.
I read it, and it made so much sense to me, it was like I was seeing clearly for the first time in my life.
This, along with therapy for only a couple months, really helped me change my life, release me from this blackmail, and in the end, the blackmailer "got over it" and I now have just as good - actually much better - relationship with her than before.
My therapist read the book and is now recommending it to other people like me.
Thanks to Susan Forward for writing this book! Do yourself a favor and read it! |
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A reader (MSL quote), USA
<2007-07-04 00:00>
This book hit the nail on the head for me. It helped me extricate myself from a life time of having to deal with my mother's emotional blackmail, PLUS confront my own maladaptive patterns that were equally bad. Uncannily enough, I had saved photocopies of a pile of letters I had sent to a long-term past boyfriend with whom I had a dysfunctional relationship. I went through all of those letters and underlined all my blackmailing tricks and named which category they belonged to. What a revelation and how wonderfully freeing. I then prayed that God would give me the courage to overcome these ways and replace it with courage and insight to be honest. Wow! I've never looked back... only to consult the book every now and again for a booster! And to re-read those letters for a laugh.
The book is also hilarious in places. Humour is just what the emotional blackmailee and 'er' need! |
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John (MSL quote), USA
<2007-07-04 00:00>
The author does a great job in detailing the many overt and covert ways of the emotional blackmailer, as well as provides many real life examples of her clients as to how they relate to the different types of blackmail.
Personally, I bought this book after I had left the woman I was involved with, whom I believe to be a narcissist. I knew something was wrong and at first I couldn't put my finger on it, which is normal in the infancy stages of blackmail. As time passed, it all came into focus and I realized that this woman's personality was not going to change and that I could not fix her so I saved what self-esteem and dignity I had left and left the relationship. The author does a great job explaining how a person's behavior can change, but their personality usually does not. That is unless however you can get the blackmailer and/or narcissist into therapy. Even then you still face dismal odds of that person changing. While the basis of this book was to deal with the blackmailer currently in your life, I used it as a reference to further reinforce why my decision to leave my relationship was the right move; and it did just that. |
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A reader (MSL quote), USA
<2007-07-04 00:00>
This book was tremendously helpful for my understanding of the characteristics and motivations of a blackmailing parent. I have spent years being dumbfounded by her behavior and wondering what on earth I did to deserve the treatment I was getting. I was just living my life - on my terms for a change - and that's when all hell broke loose! For years I could never quite articulate what was happening in this relationship, and I continued to be blindsided by the silent treatment on a cyclical basis, but everything became very clear after reading this book. Susan Forward cites a number of examples and uses descriptive anecdotes to help you identify the blackmailers in your life. In addition, she details some of the underlying reasons for the blackmailer's behavior to help you understand just why they make us so crazy! This is not a poor-me book. It is truly empowering and suggests strategies to neutralize the blackmailer's power and control over you. I no longer feel the anxiety I once felt with the anticipation of speaking with my blackmailer. I understand why she behaves the way she does and I think I now have the tools to stop her from continuing her destructive behavior. Thank you, Dr. Forward. |
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A reader (MSL quote), USA
<2007-07-04 00:00>
I have read a number of books that deal with learning how to deal with others in our lives, but none as well written as this one! Maybe it's the words she choses to use to describe what's really happening--that we are literally being 'blackmailed' by someone, to do something that we're not feeling so good about. The first half or so of the book, she talks about what's happening and how to recognize it and then in the second half, she teaches one the skills needed in order to bring back sanity to your life. I just finished reading it through the first time with lots of underlinings, and now will go through again, with more underlinings and to study it in depth. Trust me, if you're feeling whipped in your life, this book will help get you to the other side. |
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A reader (MSL quote), USA
<2007-07-04 00:00>
Excellent, thorough, complete, and powerful review of people who seek personal gain at the expense of others around them. We know that these manipulators are not the innocent victims they pretend to be due to the elaborate nature of the stories they concoct and the facts they twist in order to win your trust. Then, when you are ripe for the kill, your feet are cut out from underneath you. Emotional blackmailers use their underhanded manipulation of your emotions to extract and blast away at you assigning all blame against you and your character. Susan Forward does a masterful job of exposing the emotional blackmailers' negative psyches, overbearing toxic personalities, and ultimate goals to extract. Her subchapter title "It's All About Them" says it all. Don't ever believe that you have something to gain by engaging in the company of these personality types. |
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Mike (MSL quote), USA
<2007-07-04 00:00>
The book goes into great depth about emotional blackmailers, and their techniques. Dr. Forward explains how the black mailer did not wake up one morning and decide to be a miserable so and so, but how they come to be how they are.
The best part of the book is the strategies to cope with a manipulator and to attack the issue, and not get back into the old lose-lose sparring match. |
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1 Total 1 pages 10 items |
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