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Deal with It! A Whole New Approach to Your Body, Brain, and Life as a gURL (Paperback)
by Esther Drill, Heather Mcdonald, Rebecca Odes
| Category:
Teens, Girls Survival Guide |
| Market price: ¥ 208.00
MSL price:
¥ 198.00
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| Stock:
Pre-order item, lead time 3-7 weeks upon payment [ COD term does not apply to pre-order items ] |
MSL rating:
 Good for Gifts |
| MSL Pointer Review:
As an awesome book for teen girls, it provides a new approach for dealing with the stuff you go through in life. |
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Author: Esther Drill, Heather Mcdonald, Rebecca Odes
Publisher: Pocket
Pub. in: September, 1999
ISBN: 0671041576
Pages: 320
Measurements: 9 x 7.8 x 0.8 inches
Origin of product: USA
Order code: BC00319
Other information: ISBN-13: 978-0671041571
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- Awards & Credential -
Deal With It where have you been all my life? This gift-of-a-book helps girls deal with a huge range of issues, in a smart, honest, informative, colorful, comforting and loving way. - Francesca Lia Block, author of The Weetzie Bat books and Girl Goddess #9
As frank as Madeleine Albright's assessment of Saddam Hussein and as saucy as women's room graffiti in a college dorm... - The New Yorker
I wish this book could have been found in a bookstore as I was struggling to come to terms with approaching adulthood. A great manual to consult whenever you need confirmation that you're not half as weird and scary as your friends and family think you are. - Shirley Manson, lead singer of Garbage
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- MSL Picks -
I work at a bookstore and I noticed that a lot of young middle school girls were buying this book. So out of curiosity I bought one for myself and took it home. Let me say that it tells you everthing....Every single question you have about being a teen girl is answered in that book. From your body (and even the yucky parts about it) to your brain (emotional problems) and this isn't a little corny valley girl book. And now that I am 17 I thought I knew it all, I thought it was almost over because when I turned 18 being a teen girl would turn into a legal adult girl. But even my stubborn self learned a great deal. It has a lot of pictures and descriptions and comments from other teen girls. If your a parent I suggest you buy this for your young preteen (even 10 year olds!) we all need to be prepared for this time in our lives and there are some things you just can't talk about with your parents... In a nutshell this is one of the best books I've ever read.
(From quoting Sophia, USA)
Target readers:
Girls
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gURL.com, launched in 1996, is the leading website for teenage girls. It has been featured in Seventeen, YM, Elle, Harper's Bazaar, The New Yorker and the New York Times, among other publications.
The founders received the New York Magazine Award in 1997 for their work on gURL.com. The gURL website received a 1998 webby Award.
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From The Publisher
Straight information, lots of humor, and a beautiful layout characterize this fine addition to the self-knowledge/self-help genre. Gurl.com, a Web site for young women, contains frank information on physical and emotional development, sexuality, and life in general. Deal with It! provides a print form of selections from the site. Brilliantly colored pages with zippy graphics offer information in digestible servings. There are also many teen comments taken from the Web site, with a picture of an open mouth to indicate their origin. The comments are perfect for browsing and beg to be read aloud. The attitude is definitely antidrug, and the authors strongly encourage teens to postpose sexual activity. But there is some strong language and terminology related to sex, and synonyms and profanity are plainly listed. The ultimate effect is to de-eroticize as well as demystify the language, but individuals looking for a way to object to this frank, funny, and sure-to-be-popular book might find it here. An excellent resource list follows each section.
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Chapter One
Boobs get a lot of attention. There's a certain amount of biological motivation for this -- breasts are the first source of human nourishment -- but that's only the beginning.
The stress on boobs in our society creates a lot of stress for girls who are growing them. You don't have much control over your breast development and the outcome can be unpredictable.
When boobs start popping up left and right, they can be hard to ignore. Whatever your specific situation, shape, or size, your boobs are bound to be an important part of your female identity.
Growing Them
Breasts start to grow in response to an increase in the hormone estrogen, which causes the growth of mammary glands (which produce milk) and also signals cushions of fat to grow and surround those glands. Much of the volume of the breast comes from these cushions of fat. Also inside the breast is a network of milk ducts connected to the milk-producing glands, which are ready to send milk out of the nipple when it comes time to nurse a baby.
There are roughly five stages of breast development. Everyone goes through them at her own rate. Some girls may go through the whole process in a couple of months and can actually seem to bypass whole stages; others can take almost 10 years to get from the beginning to the (relatively) final product.
Stage I The first stage usually starts between ages 8 and 11 (although it can come earlier or later). During this stage, there are no visible signs of development. Inside the body, though, puberty is beginning. The ovaries enlarge and estrogen begins to circulate.
Stage 2 The first visible thing that happens is the nipple and the areola (the skin around the nipple) get larger and maybe a bit darker. They may also feel tender or ache a little. It can hurt to sleep on your stomach or wear certain clothes.
Next, milk ducts and fat tissue form a little, round, dense, disklike mound under each nipple and areola, making them stick out. One disk might form before the other, even as much as a year earlier. These disks can often feel like lumps.
Stage 3 Fat deposits now start to fill out the area around the nipple and areola. At this stage, many girls' breasts appear pointy. The amount of fat and where it grows vary and will determine the size and shape of your breasts. This is the time when many girls think about wearing a bra.
Stage 4 Not everyone goes through Stage 4. If you do, you will observe that your nipple and areola begin to form a separate mound at the end of your breast and get bigger and more pronounced. Some women keep this characteristic permanently. The breasts continue to fill out and grow larger. (If you didn't get your period during stage 3, you probably will now.)
Stage 5 By the time you reach stage 5, what you see could be what you get. Breast size can change during a woman's adult life, however. Generally the causes of this are hormonal (birth control pills, pregnancy) or changes in body weight, although there are a significant number of women whose breasts continue to change throughout their twenties.
Shapes and Sizes
Breasts come in all shapes and sizes. There is no one normal boob profile. And nobody notices the idiosyncrasies of your boobs like you do. The timing of your boob development makes no difference in what they end up looking like. Breasts also go through cyclical changes with the menstrual cycle. They tend
to get a little fuller and more sensitive leading up to the period and stay
pretty te der until the period is over. After the period they settle down to their less-full form.
Asymmetry
Your whole body (eyes, ears, etc.) is asymmetrical and chances are that there are some subtle differences between your two breasts, too. In some people it's enough to be noticeable, but almost never dramatically so. In rare instances, a right and left boob may vary a cup size or more. Very occasionally a girl will wear a prosthesis or even have surgery to even out a severe difference in size. Generally, though, it's one of those things that is a lot less noticeable to everyone else in the world than to the bearer of the boobs in question.
Nipples
Nipples also come in all shapes, colors, and sizes. Some nipples are particularly sensitive to outside stimuli.
Changing What You've Got
There's a long historical tradition of women making more or less of their bustlines than nature provides.
Breast enhancers
"Breast enhancers," which aren't that different from the actual implants inserted during surgery, are worn on the outside of the body and are available for purchase in the backs of magazines and at drugstores, promising every girl the silhouette she has always wanted. These products are obviously safer and cheaper than actual implants, but they don't change the way you look without a bra on.
Breast implants
First of all, no one NEEDS breast implants. Women may feel that their life enjoyment is being diminished by insufficient cup size. But that's kind of a limited way of thinking -- do you really want to give that much power to two lumps of fat sitting on your chest?
The decision of whether to alter your body for a cosmetic reason is a serious and personal one. Some women have had terrible health problems as a result of getting breast implants, although scientifically the jury is still out on whether they are dangerous. In any event, it's a good idea to wait a while before taking such a drastic step. Most reputable plastic surgeons won't even consider breast implants on a woman younger than 18. The way people feel about their bodies changes over time, and making a big, unnatural, permanent change now might be something you could later regret. Besides, you might still be growing.
Having bigger boobs won't change the kind of person you are, and if it does make more boys notice you, it might not be for the reason you want them to.
Breast reduction
Some women are physically challenged by the large size of their breasts. These problems can include chronic neck and back pain; poor posture; rashes, pain, and discomfort during exercise; and bra straps that actually cut grooves in their shoulders. Some of these women opt for breast reduction surgery to have some of the breast tissue removed. Women who have had breast reduction are said to be about the happiest plastic surgery patients afterward. Reduction surgery can leave significant scarring, usually in an inverted T-shape from the nipple to the underside of the breast, and may affect breast feeding later.
Boobs in society
There are plenty of reasons people like breasts, and focus on them accordingly. Some trace it back to infant oral fixations. Others think it may be the round shapes that are pleasing to the senses. Breasts are the most visible sexual organs. While other sexual organs are developing at the same time, they are (generally) kept under wraps and are not able to be seen. Breasts, on the other hand, make themselves known. Boobs certainly get their fair share of media attention, and the recent explosion of public breast enlargements makes them more obvious than ever. Historically, though, a variety of sizes and shapes of breasts have been considered ideal. Not all cultures share the American fixation on boobs, either. Many European countries present a more integrated view of the female body, and women appear topless on public beaches and in advertisements. On a more personal level, different people are attracted to different breast attributes (just as some people may have a preference for a certain eye color).
But many people seem to think that breasts in general are pretty great, whatever the particulars may be.
Lumps and bumps
The vast majority of lumps and bumps in the breast, at any age, are harmless. Breast budding in the early stages of breast development can often feel like a lump. At certain times of the month, especially before their periods, some women develop cysts -- small fluid-containing sacs. They are usually found near the armpits, can hurt a little, and disappear within a few days.
Show your doctor any lump that does not disappear within a few days; it is probably nothing to worry about. Breast cancer is obviously a scary and serious disease, which affects one in eight women over the course of a lifetime. But it is extremely, extremely rare in teenagers.
Fibrocystic breasts
Many girls and women develop lumpiness in their breasts due to hormonal changes during their menstrual cycle. Women with fibrocystic breasts have denser fibrous material in between the fatty deposits in their breasts, so it's more likely to become tangled up into knots. Fibrocystic lumps are not cancerous, although the first time you notice them, you may want to have them checked out.
All women experience some such cystic changes: lumpiness, tenderness, swelling. Eventually, you should get to know your own patterns of lumpiness.
Breast pain
Most girls experience some occasional breast pain -- most often before a period or during the early stages of breast development. If the pain is really plaguing you, happens at irregular times not linked to your cycle, or is much more pronounced in one breast, it's worth mentioning to your doctor, who may suggest cutting down on caffeine or taking vitamin E supplements and primrose oil.
Discharge or bleeding
Some discharge from the nipple can be brought on by hormonal fluctuations, but both discharge and bleeding that lasts for more than a week should be checked out with a doctor.
Chafed nipples
Nipples stick out and can rub against your clothes and sometimes get irritated, dry and crack, and even bleed a bit. Wearing soft fabrics or natural fibers can help. It can also help to put ointment, lanolin preparations, or even flavor -- free lip balm on irritated areas.
Inverted nipples
Some nipples do not stick out; instead, they appear to stick in (inverted nipples). This is not uncommon. Some nipples may go from "innies" to "outies"...
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| View all 8 comments |
Tessa Stephens (MSL quote), USA
<2007-02-12 00:00>
I bought the Gurl book after knowing about the Gurl website for quite some time. Luckily, this book fills it all in. I was impressed by all the information on everything a girl needs to know, all about sex, pregnancy, depression, parents, etc. etc. I think I'm maybe a little too old for the book now (I'm 18) but I'd totally recommend it for 12-16 year-olds. Some parents might not like the content (it discusses oral sex, etc.) but a girl's gonna learn about it some time, so it might as well be in a healthy, factual way. Definitely worth the money.
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Frederick Agisim (MSL quote), USA
<2007-02-12 00:00>
Though my review may be discarded on the basis of nepotism or cronyism, I submit as objective a review as I am able, considering that I have known two of the authors since infancy. I am unable to resist commenting on just how straightforward, thorough, and accurate I found this book. I treat many children and adolescents as a psychiatrist, and they are crying out for this type of information; information that we had to learn through the school of hard knocks in the past. I believe that information is power and protection, and there is nothing harmful in this book for an adolescent girl who is likely experiencing peer pressure,misinformation, shame, and ignorance, and regrettably, may be acting on it. Anyone who thinks that they can protect their children from growing up by witholding information is in a significant state of denial. If not here, then they will gather misinformation from friends or hormonally charged (or challenged)boyfriends. Straight talk from mature girls to girls, with the editorial assistance of health and mental health professionals, confers protection on your adolescent, child, and even on you. There is nothing to fear in this book, and some adults would do well to read and reread it.
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Jenny (MSL quote), USA
<2007-02-12 00:00>
I wish we would have had a book like this in the late 70's /early 80's when i was in junior/senior high school. this book will help so many kids with questions/problems that they do not yet feel comfortable speaking with their friends and family about. don't worry gurls-you'll love talking about all things with your gurlfriends as you get older! this book is perfect. and take this advise to heart-these chick's know what's up. way to go rebecca!
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A reader (MSL quote), USA
<2007-02-12 00:00>
Wow! I'm 22 and haven't been introduced to some of the subject matter in this book! Well, I have BY NOW, but only thru MY OWN xploration. For instance, we don't quite cover female masturbation in health class, even tho it should B made clear that it is a normL, healthy event. When I have a daughter of my own, U'd better believe this book will B waiting on her bookshelf when she hits about 12!! This book will help foster self-esteem, independence, and self-confidence. Gurl Power!
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